


Workplace Violence

by She_Who_Only_Knows_War



Category: Original Work
Genre: Gen, Murderous Character, Really Dumb Character, Typical Male Character, attempts at humor, probably cliché, villain-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-24
Updated: 2015-04-24
Packaged: 2018-03-25 12:18:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 715
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3810109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/She_Who_Only_Knows_War/pseuds/She_Who_Only_Knows_War
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bunny has a plot ready to go. Too bad it doesn't go as planned.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Workplace Violence

**Author's Note:**

> I wanted to try humor again. Bad idea, I know. But practice makes funny, right?

Red wire to orange.  
Purple wire to blue.  
This would be the end of Magnum Facere if it was the last thing she did!  
Tossing her blonde hair over her shoulder, Bunny finished the tampering of the elevator wires.  
Yes. The elevator would drop and people would think the elevator installer did wrong.  
And she would be free of Magnum Facere.  
Picking up her tool kit, she made her way over to bid other people away from this specific elevator. Until she saw Magnum talking to the cute guy from the Office Corporation.  
As they talked, they walked. And Bunny realized Magnum Facere was going to get on the elevator with Cute Guy.  
Making her way over, She waved at Magnum. "Hellooo."  
"Oh, Beverly!"  
"Bunny." She deadpanned.  
Cute Guy gave her a strange glance. It was because of her undeniable hotness, Bunny was sure.  
"I was just walking our friend, Aletheia, to his office on the top floor."  
"The stairs are better," Bunny tells him, taking him lightly by the arm with a strained smile.  
"Well, I like to work out at the gym. Not in the office."  
"Then let's take the old elevator for reminiscence's sake!"  
Aletheia, pulls away before she cam march off with him. "This one is closer."  
Magnum Facere smiles kindly. "You're hiding something, Bonnie."  
"What? What am I hiding?" Bunny clings to Aletheia's arm. "I'm not hiding anything!"  
Aletheia looks through her and she feels like she might keel over.  
"You're scared we'll find out you're afraid of elevators, aren't you?"  
Bunny stares. "Ummm. Yes. I'm terrified of elevators."  
"That's okay," Says Mangum Facere. "We'll meet you up there."  
"No. No. Aletheia has to come with me."  
Magnum tilts her head. "If I didn't know any better..."  
Bunny squeezes her eyes shut.  
"You're afraid of being alone in that creepy staircase, aren't you?"  
Bunny nods. "I always think someone will get me!"  
"Then let's go together! It's not fair to make Aletheia climb the stairs when he doesn't want to."  
Bunny can feel her eye twitching.  
Aletheia stands a foot away, looking as aware as he ever does - which means oblivious as hell - but Sweet Sweden is he beautiful.  
She has to stop him from getting on that damn elevator. But Magnum has already taken her by the arm and begun to make off with her, chattering mindlessly in a one-sided conversation.  
The last thing she sees before her view is blocked by the stairwell is Aletheia, hands in his pockets, staring at nothing as he waits for the elevator.

There's screaming when they get to the floor Aletheia's office is on.  
The elevator did indeed malfunction as planned.  
Bunny throws the nearest chair against the wall in fury.  
"I hate to say it, But I'm really grateful we didn't get on the elevator," Says Magnum Facere, wiping her tears with a handkerchief.  
Bunny spins around. "That elevator ride was for you, you dolt!"  
She takes Bunny's hand in hers. "You reserved an elevator just for me, Bretta? That's so kind of you! But I'm quite afraid of elevators right now."  
Bunny snatches her hand away. "You were supposed to die in that elevator crash! I rigged it specifically for you!"  
There's a moment when Magnum looks into Bunny's face like she's just seeing her for the first time. And Bunny realizes that she has just given herself away.  
"Brigitte, sometimes, I think you're trying to kill me."  
Face twisting into a snarl, Bunny grabs the nearest thing to her right hand, which happens to be a stapler, and raises it to do things the old fashioned way before Magnum Facere gasps.  
"Yes," Yells Bunny. "Now you get it!"  
"Aletheia!" She cries, running past Bunny.  
And Cute Guy really IS there, rumpled like he was attacked by a giant robot fan bent on the blowing away of all human kind - Bunny should really build one of those soon.  
"How did you escape?!"  
"Magic," He says, looking like he doesn't care about almost dying in a bloody elevator.  
Does nothing bother him?  
Bunny finds this both deranged and sexy at once.  
But something is off about him. And Bunny can't figure out what it is.  
The office building, finding no one injured in the crash, goes back to business as usual.


End file.
